Mother Nature = insane

I have newfound respect for nature. Especially for invertebrates. For molluscs. It is a respect fuelled largely by fear/revulsion. A lot of revulsion. Did I mention revulsion? So much so that the revulsion kind of overwhelms the awe at the kind of disturbing awesomeness.

Check this out. Seriously. You don't want to miss the first two images.
http://www.bogleech.com/bio-clampirism.html

Also, this.
http://www.cracked.com/article_18746_the-9-most-mind-blowing-disguises-in-animal-kingdom.html

And while we're on the topic of disturbing invertebrates... lampreys. For those of you who have had to endure me spontaneously uttering "Lamprey!" during our last school days of Year 11, now you know can see what I was talking about, if you didn't know already: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lamprey

As you can see, it's not the sort of thing that easily slips your mind. Or at least, my mind. And for some reason, the name is oddly fun to utter spontaneously and slip into conversation.

In case you were wondering, I found all this out from reading articles on Cracked.com and linkjumping. And man, I am so put off oceans now. And just marine environments in general. Aiieeesh.

Primary schoolz0rz

Because I am a sheep, Lia and Ri and I's talk of primary school combined with Lia's post about primary school made me want to blog about primary school.

...Not really. But eh.

1. Some teachers were hilarious. Which was good.

2. One particular teacher was a douchebag. I've a couple of humiliating memories thanks to that guy, one of which was also my first practical lesson on "There Are Times When Telling The Truth To Teachers Is A Terrible Idea". Though he was funny, at times, and not really mean...? And I got my first vaguely prestigious academic award from him LOL. If you can call primary school awards prestigious. It was one of the presentation day ones, okay! Prestigious enough for a kid whose age wasn't yet counted in double digits. BUT STILL. D-baggggg.

3. I was an stupidly violent/agro child... not good haha. Very not good.

4. There was a guy who I was vaaaaaguely friendly with but who then turned against me after I accidentally snapped his ruler when using it to flick an eraser through the air. If said guy somehow reads this and remembers me... HI!
 
5. I was top of the class and possibly/probably grade. Lol. Then I came to NSG.
 
6. Library had quite good books, I think. That was cool.
 
7. OMG CANTEEN CHEAP FOOD!
 
8. OMG SCHOLASTIC/APPLE BOOK CLUB THING!!!! I LOVED THAT! OMFGGGGG. Going through all the catalogues was so fun. And casting my memory back, those books were SO FRIGGING CHEAP. Aaaaaiiiieee///flail. Too bad I didn't get to buy many books haha. Parents were kind of strict as to what I could get, so all I really bought were cheap Scholastic classics which I never read and random cheap stationery sets which were cool but which I also never used hahahhaa. Kind of annoying because in hindsight those books were frigging CHEAP but it's all good because now my parents randomly buy me RRP books if I really want them. YEYYY. ...And of course sometimes I just buy them myself. Because I am such a self-sufficient teen. (Not.)

9. Book Club stuff was so good! Yes, this deserves another point. Because it was just SO AWESOME. The colourful catalogues! The... anticipation/etc. when your stuff finally arrived! Even if it was a random classic you'd never read... Eeeee. I think this is one of the things I miss most about primary. Frigging hell why can't we have Book Club? Though actually I don't really mind because NSG library has a lot of awesome books too, and you can email the librarian and request books to be ordered/bought. Mmmmmm //drool

10. We had a creative writing assignment in Year...5? 6? And it was meant to be one A4 page or something, and I went overboard and wrote seven pages. Hahahhaha.

11. Ms R, my teacher for Year 5/6, had a bookshelf in the room full of novels and stuff we could borrow. Among them were a large number of ANIMORPHS BOOKS. HOLY EFF I FUCKING LOVED THOSE BOOKS.

12. Mrss G (Year 4? Can't remember properly aaagh) would read Goosebumps books to our class. It was awesome. R. L. Stine's cliffhanger chapter endings... and it'd be humourously anticlimactic or something. "Her fingers were dripping with blood, etc. etc." and the next chapter would continue and be like "Ahh damn I was chopping vegetables and the knife slipped."

13. I have a sneaking suspicion that my primary school was larger in area than NSG... or the same size? Which actually isn't saying much hahha.

I think I forgot how fun primary school sometimes was hahaha. I still prefer high school [hands down] but there were still good times... //corny

10daymeme: TEN

Day ten: one confession

1. In first grade I got put into detention for biting someone. Yearp. (Is that confessiony enough for you guys? IS IT?)

10daymeme: NINE

Day nine: two smileys that describe your life right now.

1. :D

2. :I

10daymeme: EIGHT

Day eight: three turn ons.

1. Defined bones (yes that sounds weird, no I'm not going to explain). Especially hands. And clavicles. And profiles. (Metacarpals and phalanges for the win!) Moving on...

2. Defined-but-lean musculature, if that makes sense. Know what I mean? No? Yeah, whatever.

3. A nice voice.

10daymeme: SEVEN

Day seven: four turn offs.

1. Lack of at least relatively decent personal hygiene and/or table manners. Eww.

2. Excessive profanity/vulgarity/rudeness. I don't mind too much if you've got your mind living in a gutter and swear a lot, seeing as I do that too... but if it gets excessive... no, go away. If you have no sense at all of when to keep a civil tongue in your head, if you are unnecessarily rude/disgusting to a degree that surpasses my tolerance and/or my idea of what is appropriate for the situation... GO AWAY.

3. Being truly, faithfully religious. Sorry, you're talking to a religiously-richocheting atheist/agnostic here.

4. Genuine malevolence/cruelty/mean-ness.

10daymeme: FIVE

Day five: six things you wish you’d never done.

I don't actually have six things I wish I'd never done. Sure, many mistakes and some near-FUBAR incidents but I don't truly wish I'd never done any of the things I've done. I'm not into changing the past (or looking into the future, for that matter... which is vaguely irrelevant, but this feels like a good slot to mention it in hahaha) and I don't have any serious regrets... at least, NOT NOW. HAHA.

TL;DR answer: none, because I appreciate the knowledge/experience one gains from fucking things up, etc.

Notes to self: regarding exam post-mortems and other fascinating things

1. OH SNAPPPPP.

2. don't procrastinate bludge!drawing lol gdi

3. urrrr go through modhist essay w/sm1th?

4. When you have the faint inkling that a particular topic will make for a bitchy essay topic... AVOID IT AND GO FOR THE OTHER TOPIC. Even if the other topic seems less interesting in terms of narrative. Because essays aren't all about narrative! And who cares if you don't find it interesting? IT'S THE MARK YOU'RE AFTER DANGIT. Pick the topic that you can most easily/best write an ace-material essay on. Augen zu und durch!

5. DAS KLEID. DAS. DAS. DAS. Also...genitives...hmm. Oh well it gains you show-offy points lulz. But you'll be learning them soon! I think. YAY!

6. DON'T USE THE DICTIONARY SO FRIGGING MUCH FFFFFFFF. Leave like 5-10 mins to PROOFREAD THE WRITING.

7. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT. GUT INSTINCT!

8. Visual Communication + International Studies at UTS? 2010 ATAR = 97.35   ////meaning GET THE ACT TOGETHER

9. Don't procrastinate sleeping for no good reason. Wtf.

10. Check the delusion, kid.

10daymeme: FOUR

Day four: seven things that cross your mind a lot.

1. music/lyrics of random songs (mostly the ones I currently really like)

2. German

3. drawing/art

4. academic blah, e.g. HSC

5. "If I were to never see you again..." -- literally never see, as in death/etc. About a few people.

6. "I should write more..."

7. the CincLock-VII system

Yo sup guys

YOU SHADOW READERS OF MY BLOG
who lurk here but never comment -

COMMENT PLEASE (:

in the shoutbox or whatever. I like to know that I'm being stalked. And it will keep me more motivated to blog, unless you tell me you're some eagle-eyed creep who's watching me as I'm typing this.

...Yeah, you could completely ignore this call for comments. But that would be MEAN and MALICIOUS and MALODOROUS! Also, misogynistic and misanthropic. No, I just wanted to keep using long words beginning with M, haha.

NOSTALGIA SPEW

Preamble:
Yeah I was going to do the 10 day meme in ten days, however due to certain circumstances (VD essay, semi-formal, dead, dead, did I mention dead?) I cbb/forgot to do it in consecutive days. AND YOU KNOW WHAT, LOOPHOLE OHSNAP because the thing never said it had to be consecutive days ahaaaaa ///shot

So, I found this cool-ish meme thing on dA. And I'm so dead I don't even feel like drawing and I'm like listening to Wannabe by Spice Girls over and over again (lol curses to you, Alissimo).


10 YEARS AGO I...
1. had no friends, I think. HAHA.
2. didn't like reading... I think. Possibly because I couldn't actually read yet. I can't actually remember, though... was it ten years ago or nine that I first started reading some kind of stories properly??
3. had been alive for less than a decade (in this body/consciousness/mind, at least hahaha).

5 YEARS AGO I...
1. landed a place at NSG and was ecstatic.
2. spent three months in China on holiday (in the middle of school LULZ) and subsequently forgot pretty much all the maths I knew... no seriously, even now I cannot recall my times tables with the near-lightning speed of which I was once in command. Le sigh.
3. really liked writing supposed original fiction and was in that Mary-Sue/self-insertion/plagiarising-of-favourite-books'-concepts phase that I like to believe that most wannabe writers go through.

3 YEARS AGO I...
1. was convinced that I could draw quite well, and was physically incapable of seeing/accepting criticism of my godly skillz0rz.
2. expanded my number of friends to a quantity greater than, say, three.
3. joined the Australian Army Cadets! ...which I dropped out of a couple of years later.

1 YEAR AGO I...
1. GOT MY PAWS ON MY INTUOS3 GRAPHICS TABLET!
2. discovered Tokio Hotel.
3. was notably less happy than I am now.

SO FAR THIS YEAR I...
1. have aced one subject.
2. have locked my sights on Visual Communication / International Studies at UTS... HELLO RELATIVELY-HIGH ATAR I AM COMING TO GET YOUUU!
3. have enjoyed myself.

YESTERDAY I...
1. watched Inception!
2. had to take two trains, a bus and another train in order to get to the cinema to watch Inception...
3. looked up the lyrics to the Spice Girls' Wannabe

TODAY I...
1. did housework in the morning ffffff.
2. ate nice pizza for lunch.
3. need to prepare my brick for Yellow Brick Road lulz.

TOMORROW I WILL...
1. draw/paint digitally (for fun, not for school, yeyyy).
2. have to go to school AAAGGGGHHHH.
3. write something creative.

SOMEDAY I WILL...
1. write a novel and get it published.
2. become a polyglot.
3. BE RICH HAHAHAHHAHAH YES SURE HAHA. HA.

10daymeme: TWO

Day two: nine things about yourself.

1. I have a slight OCD thing about washing my hands... as anyone who has waited for me to emerge from a bathroom will probably have guessed.

2. I am somewhat neurotic/paranoid and the most random/weird things can pester my mind for ages.

3. When I'm drawing a non-neutral/vaguely-extreme facial expression (e.g. yawning, mouth hanging open in shock and rage), I tend to... mimic that facial expression. (I've only noticed this applying to semi-realistic drawing, though, not cartoons or emote-type faces.)

4. The name "Rain" (my most commonly-used alias which has morphed into an IRL nickname) has nothing to do with my other weathery name. It was derived by dear Ara-la from "Saraine", which was the name of a roleplay character I had... three years ago?

5. I've grown a liking for travelling by train.

6. I like knowing medical/military jargon. Don't ask.

7. I'm quite unskilled/untalented in any kind of performing art and in most kinds of sport - i.e. in most things that involve physical movement that looks/sounds nice and/or coordinated.

8. I can pull symbolism/innuendo from ANYTHING.

9. In the vast majority of cases, I really don't like it when people say FML.

10daymeme: ONE

Day one: ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.

1. Stay strong and look after yourself, you're worth so much more than you think you are.

2. It really does make me a little happier when I see that you're happy.

3. Sei proprio forte, simpatica e intelligente! TVB, carina.

4. I probably won't actually do anything no matter how angry I get, thanks to the existence of the law and such, so there's no point going for a plausible threat - you fuck this up and I'll strangle you with barbed wire.

5. I was going to type something for you in debatably-broken Al Bhed, so... be glad/not!glad that this is in English: YOU LOOK KINDA LIKE A CRISIS! AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!

6. We used to be such good friends... hmm... a pity. Long climb back, I guess? Sometimes I find you annoying, but I also think you're pretty cool and worthy of admiration.

7. The reason I flat-out rejected you so quickly was... because I thought you were kidding! Or messing with me, or taking a dare. And, um, don't ask why I assumed that. It was four years ago... which doesn't explain anything, but sounds like a good excuse so er yes...

8. You were such an asshole, man! Not sure why I still vaguely enjoyed your company. You seem to have gotten nicer, though, or maybe you were perfectly nice and balanced all along but me, being the talented one I am, just managed to bring out your d-bag side... but I doubt it haha.

9. You were/are charismatic, funny, and also somewhat fetching. And that time you said something to me and grinned and I kind of grinned back and acted like I knew what you were saying? I still don't know what you actually said to me. And if you can remember what it was, I will be mightily surprised and impressed.

10. WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU WAVE TO ME WHENEVER YOU SEE ME?

One thing to say:

I love Taylor Swift songs.

"The Pig Farmer"

Interesting article. It's long, but quiet well-written and interesting.

http://www.johnrobbins.info/blog/the-pig-farmer/

arbitrary thoughtspew

1. I really like Jared Leto's eyes in the From Yesterday music vid. And his name. And his singing's cool too, did I mention that? xD

2. I have this renewed wave of love for Tokio Hotel AHAHAHHA <3333 ... though only the songs from Zimmer 483 and Schrei atm

3. ....BIOLOGEHHH TOMORROWWWWWW

4. 30 Seconds to Mars cover of Gaga's Bad Romance! It's pretty awesome and I LOVE THE GUITAR SOUND when it does that "ra ra ah-ah-ah" part... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7spoPjx7hs&feature=related

5. The last three dotpoints in the prelim Bio syllabus are weird and English-like . . . like . . . essay-like . . . or something . . . yeah . . . still need to scribble some notes for that gahhahhaha

homfgggg

Just finished notes for 8.4 Life on Earth chapter
Major cramming. Major crashcoursing.
. . .why do I even bother going to school, I just learn the year's stuff in about four days
////KIDDING
(about the bothering to go to school thing, that is. not kidding about learning the stuff in four days. well, okay, not really learning it all in four days but i am doing all my notes in that time aaaaaaahahahha)


the year's osmosis!learning probably helped and by that I mean osmosis in the figurative sense not the diffusion of water across a selectively permeable membrane sense

JEEEEZ
okay, one more Bio topic to cover . . . 8.5: evolution of Australain biota

AND HECKKZ0RZ I need to study for VA test tomorrow hahahah

CHEMICALS + INDICATORS, aka the stupid thing I missed out in in class which seems to crop up often in exams or something

STARCH
indicator = iodine
no heat involved in test
positive result: blue-black/purple
negative result: yellow-brown, no colour change

GLUCOSE
indicator = Benedict's solution
heat - heat in water bath using a Bunsen burner
positive: orange-red
negative: pale blue, no colour change

PROTEIN
indicator = Biuret's test (what an annoying name to remember hahah) which is 5 drops of dilute sodium hydroxide and 3 drops of copper sulfate
no heat
positive: purple
negative: pale blue, no colour change

LIGNIN
indicator = 3 drops of toluidine blue
no heat
positive: blue-green
negative: pale blue, no colour change

CHLORIDE IONS
indicator = 3 drops silver nitrate
no heat
positive: white precipitate forms
negative: no precipitate



-
now if only the rest of my revision was little bits of seems-like-trivia like this hmmm
IF THIS DOESN'T COME UP IN THE EXAM AT ALL
//////raeg


OKAY FINISHED MAKING NOTES FOR
+ 8.2 -  A Local Ecosystem; and
+ 8.3 - Patterns in Nature


FUCK YEAH
...victory profanity. you were expecting it. i knew you were, or at least . . . you were if you're a regular reader of this blog / know me IRL . . . or something

Organic and inorganic compounds found in cells and their uses in cells

alternate title: but first, before day 1 of the 10daymemething, is biology

I present to you various garbled Bio notes from 8.3, i.e. Patterns in Nature, i.e. the gigantic chem-like hideous topic which is actually interesting once I start reading/making notes properly but by the time I've convinced myself to do that, I'm running out of time fffffffff anyway--

oh and DISCLAIMER: heed these at your own risk for I've no idea if they're 100% correct (:
they're just... mainly... you know, occasionally-note-assisted regurgitaton for my own memory/desperatepre-examcramming

 

1. Organic compounds in cells. Organice = synthesised by living things; contains carbon combined with hydrogen

CARBOHYDRATES
Made of carbon, oxygen and hydrogen
e.g. sugars, starch, glycerol
Sugars provide a form of quick energy to the cell
Sugar (in the form of glucose) is a reactant in aerobic cellular respiration, which produces ATP
Starch and glycerol are forms of stored energy
Cellulose is a structural part of cell walls

PROTEINS
Contain carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen and sometimes phosphorous and sulfur
Made up of long chains of amino acids joined by peptide bonds; long chains = polypeptides
Sequence of amino acids determines what kind of protein is formed
Proteins are used by the cell in growth and repair
Form an important structural component, e.g. in cell membrane and cytoskeleton
As enzymes, proteins control all metabolic reactions within cells

LIPIDS
Contains carbon, hydrogen and a small amount of oxygen
One glycerol to which fatty acids are joined
Store large amounts of energy (in the form of fat) - important biological fuel
Major structural component of all membranes in cells

NUCLEIC ACIDS
Made up of long chains of nucleotides
Nucleotide = ribose or deoxyribose sugar + nitrogen base + phosphate
DNA stores the info that controls all the activities of the cell; it also contains the hereditary info that is passed through generations in reproduction, etc.
RNA is used by ribosomes in protein synthesis, and it also does other stuff . . . I think . . . yeah . . .

-

2. Inorganic molecules do not contain carbon combined with hydrogen and they do not form long chains.

WATER
Water forms 90% of the protoplasm (which is the entirety of the cell)
It is a transport medium
It is the medium in which all chemical reactions in cells take place
It can be used to regulate temperature in organisms
Can be a reactant in reactions

MINERAL SALTS
Chlorides, carbonates of sodium, phosphates, nitrates, etceteraaaaa
Dissolved as ions in the cytoplasm and in the vacuoles of plant cells
Used in the synthesis of macromolecules and body tissues (iron in blood, calcium in bones/teeth)
Assist in chemical reactions by helping enzymes to function
Assist in water balance
Essential for functioning of cell membrane and nerve+muscle cells

[some] GASES
Carbon dioxide + oxygen
Dissolved in the protoplams
Used and/or produced in chloroplasts and mitochondria
Carbon dioxide is a reactant in photosynthesis and a product of aerobic cellular respiration
Carbon dioxide can also react with water to form biocarbonates, a buffer limiting changes in cells' pH
Oxygen is a product of photosynthesis and a reactant in aerobic cellular respiration



...yeah once again you see that I have this disturbing/stupid penchant to like to go into unncessary detail. What are the chances that we'll need to know that carbon dioxide reacts with water to form a bicarbonate that helps regulate acidity/alkalinity levels in cells? Or that mineral salts are essential in the functioning muscle and nerve cells?

Need to remember:
carbohydrates in the form of sugars provide a quick source of energy for the cell
carbohydrates in the form of starch and glycerol are forms of stored energy

10 day meme/timewaster/extractorofsincerityandhonestysomewhat

Day one: ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day two: nine things about yourself.
Day three: eight ways to win your heart.
Day four: seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day five: six things you wish you’d never done.
Day six: five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day seven: four turn offs.
Day eight: three turn ons.
Day nine: two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day ten: one confession

I originally wasn't really intending to do this but I think the clouds of luff richocheting in the section of the blogosphere that I frequent has changed my mind (:

But first I must make more Biology notes. Like seriously aaaarrgh.

ACCIDENTI

The knuckles of my left hand hurt
Joint pain or something
I'M GETTING OLD CRAPPPP

Lol it's probably weird RSI I think/hope
Grrr still need to cover er . . . most of the prelim Bio syllabus... covered the ecosystem section, now for the rest DANGGG

I need to study biology today ahhahahah and

I just remembered a really weird dream I had last night when one of my friends who doesn't draw AT ALL had a CINTIQ TABLET just lying around somewhere.

Well, not really lying around literally, but yeah. They had one. And in the dream I was something like . . . speechless with shock. Like literally speechless. Dumbfounded. Awestruck. Horrorstruck. Dismayed beyond belief.

LOL OKAY I'LL SHUT UP WITH THE SYNONYM THINGIES NOW.

. . . Yeah, guys. You needed to know that. Then again, you probably do only read my blog for random details of my life / brain, because that's pretty much all I post. Unless it's for the dodgy Modern History notes HAHAHAH.

Oh and the occasional video/pic that I have some strong opinion of, hmm.

Anglo-German naval race

In 1889 Britain was all like, because we're an island nation with a far-flung empire, it's essential we have a kick-ass navy. They developed the two power standard, which was . . . their navy had to be the same size as the next two most powerful navies in the world combined (i.e. those of France and Russia).

So Britain had this awesomely powerful navy.

THEN in 1896 Grand Admiral von Tirpitz of Germany decides to biuld up and expand the German navy. Principle: build a navy powerful enough that it would deter Britain because any attempt to destroy it would be too costly to risk.

Britain: WTF GERMANY'S EXPANDING HER NAVY? When she's already got Europe's most powerful army? I see no reason for this! This smells like a threat to British security! Wtf!

Tensions mounted. In 1906 Britain suggested mutual naval limitations. However Germany wanted a guarantee of British neutrality in any future European war. Britain refused, as she was wary/scared of German expansionism.

In 1905 Britain comes out with the Dreadnought class battleship. It outpaces and outguns all other battleships then in existence. It runs on steam turbine engines which allow it to run at 21.6 knots per hour and it follows Vittorio Cuniberti's "all big gun" concept - that the ideal battleship has no intermmediate guns, just big ones.

BUT instead of strengthening Britain's naval position, the introduction of the Dreadnought weakens it because it renders every pre-Dreadnought in the fleet REDUNDANT/OBSOLETE. Furthermore, when Germany starts building Dreadnought class ships of her own, the naval race is even as they are starting from the same position.

Yeah, jeeeez.

EVENTUALLY AT 1914 BRITAIN WINS THE DREADNOUGHT RACE.
I'm not going to spew out the numbers bc they'll take up valuable space in my head which I need for other stuff.

Yeah I have this aptitude for remembering slightly non-necessary things. Like the knot speed.

Unification of Germany and stuff

More memory-regurgitation . . . it's like Pensieving gone really weird (not to mention Muggle)With occasional looking back at my notes because I still haven't memorised 100% of the details AHAHAHAH

1815
After the Napoleonic Wars, 39 states emerge in the Germanic region instead of 300+
The Congress of Vienna takes place, during which Prince Metternich of Austria is a dominant figure. He does not want German unification to take place for fear that it will bring about change that will challenge the power of the Austrian King. He is also wary of the power of the other large Germanic state . . . PRUSSIAAAAA.
Unification is delayed.
Andddd Otto von Bismarck is born . . . ON APRIL FOOLS DAY (:

1819
Metternich implements the Carlsbad Decrees to control the kinds of ideas taught in universities. This is done to stifle liberalism, nationalism and in general ideas that promote change . . . (??)

1834
Prussia sets up the Zollverein, an economic union that removes tariff barriers that limit trade between Germanic states. Almost all Germanic states join, including Austria. This amounts to economic unification and is an important step to political unification.

1848
A rash of revolutions break out across Europe. The rulers of several German states are compelled to accept liberal constitutions. The revolutions seem to succeed, until 830 elected representatives gather in what is known as the Frankfurt Assembly and try to draw up a constitution for a united Germany. What happens is that there's a huge conflict over whether Austria is going to be included and the constitution is delayed until 1849. By this time, the strength of the revolutions has weakened and most of the liberal reforms are revoked. The last liberal uprisings are crushed by the Prussian Army.

1864
The duchies of Schleswig and Holstein are in dispute. Their population is mainly German and Holstein is a member of the Confederation. However, Danish nationalists seek to incorporate them into Denmark. In 1963 Danish King Christian IX decrees a closer union of the duchies with Denmark. There is an OUTCRY in Germany, especially as a German prince was a rival claimant to the duchies. PRUSSIA and AUSTRIA join forces and go to war against Denmark over control of Schleswig and Holstein. Denmark loses.

oh look, a brotherly dispute
Prussia and Austria fall out over the spoils of the war. This is temporarily solved by the Convention of Gastein in 1865. Austria gets to administer Holstein, and Prussia gets to administer Schleswig. However, Bismarck wants both duchies and sets about preparing for war and diplomatically isolating Austria (Bismarck proves to be good at this whole lonerate-countries-and-deny-them-allies thing hahaha)

AUSTRO-PRUSSIAN WAR!
Bismarck provokes Austria into a war over Holstein. When Austria submits their dispute to the Confederation Diet, Bismarck responds by alleging that Austria violated the Gastein Conference and sends Prussian troops to Holstein. Austria responds by calling on the Confederation to mobilise against Prussia. Many German states respond. However, the Prussian army proves superior and defeats Austria in seven weeks. The Austrians surrender after the decisive Prussian victory at the Battle of Sadowa. The peace terms under the Treaty of Prague are lenient, for Bismarck doesn't want a bitter enemy on his southern border.

North German Confederation
Following the Austro-Prussian War, most of the North German states are drawn together by Bismarck (presumably...?) into a military alliance which then becomes a state: the North German Confederation. Now, time to get another common enemy and unite the South with the North.

FRANCO-PRUSSIAN WAR! 1870-1871
In 1868 there was a dispute between France and Prussia over who would succeed to the Spanish throne. Prussia wanted Leopold, a Hohenzollern prince, to succeed. France did not. France asked Leopold to withdraw his candidature for the throne, which he did. The French then sent the ambassador to Prussia, Count Benedetti, to Ems to meet with the Prussian King, Wilhelm I. France wanted a promise that no Hohenzollern prince would ever take the Spanish throne. Wilhelm refused. The meeting was conducted in a friendly atmosphere. Wilhelm reported the meeting via telegram to Bismarck, who EDITED THE TELEGRAM in what was to be known as the Ems Dispatch, changing the wording to make the tone of the meeting appear to be HOSTILE. When the Ems Dispatch was published, it aroused strong public feeling in both France and Prussia. So great were the nationalist passions that arose in France that Napoleon III declared war against Prussia. Prussia defeated the France. Under the Treaty of Frankfurt, by which peace was made, France was forced to cede Alsace and Lorraine and pay a war indemnity of 5 billion francs.

AND HELLO GERMAN EMPIRE!
The Franco-Prussian war created an upsurge of nationalist feeling that swept the South German states into a union with the north, thus creating the united German Empire which was declared on January 18 in the Hall of Mirrors in Versailles. Wilhelm I  became the German Emperor and Bismarck became the Chancellor of Germany.




----yeah can i keel over now
GOD I HOPE I REMEMBER THIS

or maybe i'll just write about the Arab/Israel conflict . . . Six Day War and Yom Kippur War. Though how I'll manage to absorb stuff about that on top of all this is . . . slightly . . . beyond me . . . vaguely . . .

STILL NEED TO:
write something about Bismarck's motives for German unification, and
the arms race stuff that happened before WWI, esp the Anglo-German naval race

HELLO DREADNOUGHTS :3